Helping other people first, and expecting absolutely nothing in return is true networking.2) If you want to connect with people, ask people for a contact method that they would be most willing to give to you.

We’re renting an apartment ourselves - didn’t want to buy when we knew absolutely nothing about the cities or market out here.

You're absolutely in the right place to learn from the pros.

After speaking with a realtor she made me feel obligated like I absolutely had to work with a realtor in order to check out homes and cannot contact a seller unless I had one represent me.

He's absolutely correct. 

My goal is to own a fairly decent size portfolio, absolutely no less then 5 units in the next 5 years.

We are surrounded by absolute incompetence.

So keep interviewing because you can absolutely get a 15% down option with a conventional loan which would be considerable lower interest rate than a private/portfolio loan.  

I would only move back if it was absolutely necessary.

Absolutely.