I have prioritized shorter term flexibility over long term maximum benefit. I haven't put much at all into my wife and I's 401ks, but were fortunate that both our employers have contributed on our behalf via profit sharing. Our own savings are in roughly a 70/20/10 split between RE/dividend stocks/cash. This is somewhat close to where I want to be long term, but would like to bolster the stocks up a bit. I use HELOC and margin to do shorter term flips if I need a little extra cash, but everything else I buy with a 10+ year time horizon in mind.
In probably 5 years or so, I will pivot strongly towards funding retirement accounts for tax advantages and only because I anticipate having a level of passive income that provides my family flexibility. The biggest investment decision I find myself facing currently is how much long term I want to personally own and manage real estate vs passively via syndications.
I would tell a 23 yr old to hit it hard prior to kids, because having a kid and being a present father is a game changer.