It feels like your post came right out of my head because I went through the same exact thing. This is very difficult for those of you reading that may not understand. I struggled for a long time (and still do a little) with this, as my first instinct when I find a deal is always, "how can I keep this one".
Honestly for me, I moved away from wholesaling and just built a wholesale friendly brokerage instead. So this way, I still get to do a little wholesaling but I also work with other amazing wholesalers (that are better than me) and I still get to look at a lot of deals, while also still making money helping other investors buy and sell properties.
It's extremely difficult to completely shift your mind away from this way of thinking. It's like expecting a wild animal to not act so wild.
I know I didn't tell you what you wanted to hear but I at least wanted to respond and validate your concerns. I'm in Jay too, let me know if you want to chat. Good luck!