Chances are the bank is committee reviewing the loan and is exploring some workout strategies on their own.  

Any reputable lumber yard will tell you exactly what you need for a header. 

I think financing is probably one of the areas I know least about and is something I need to start exploring.

I say spend the $500 and have a reputable licensed environmental company do the soil test around the tank to give you some indication of any potential leak.  

So I decided to explore the route of hard money lenders.  

These are the contacts I am searching for so that when I am ready to pull the trigger, I know exactly who to run to.However, I do want to confirm that we are in VERY similar situations and the options you are exploring (FHA, 203k, as well as purchasing an MFH by the end of the 2016/early 2017) is nearly identical to my own.

My LO stated that if not for the new rule regarding 100 miles we would have no issue (when we prequalified last year we were fine)Now i have explored the legal side with multiple attorneys and loan officers and have been assured that as long as i live in the 4 unit that we currently own, there is no issue with her buying and living in the FHA building (both would still be Owner occupied).

I cant help with the Small Claims court question unfortunately, but I do insure about 500 condo associations in the Twin Cities area and work with a few very reputable Property Management Companies if you would like some recommendations.

But some places are old and just haven't updated such rules so maybe you could explore it. 

Take your time and fully explore the blogs, podcasts, webinars...don't forget the tool bar above to learn as much as you can about REI.