What I want is a way to have and trade the stocks and bonds I currently own at a large brokerage in an IRA (as well as ETFs preferably), but held (without paying extra foreign tax) offshore.

Use that loan to pay the back taxes and get things under control.

The guests refused to pay.  

I would focus on the house hack and not take a pay cut.

We almost went with a loan that we have to pay all the cost upfront and then get reimbursed on the back end and that was just not something we were willing to do.

There are quite a number of things that can make utilizing an FHA loan more difficult such as more barriers during appraisal, appearance of low qualification/little cash, typically longer closing period, likely higher interest rate, and PMI cannot be dropped without a refinance if 3.5% down.That said, just chain 5% down conventional loans, and make sure your duplexes pay for themselves.  

Determine at what percentage of completion you'll pay for work done. i.e.

The only thing in that county is that I pay a higher property tax rate as an investor vs. a homeowner. 

I dont think I would have any cash flow from renting after paying me mortgage.

If you want to buy in capital hill and this is a way to afford something you otherwise can’t go for it, thing getting a nice car and ubering part time to pay for it.