Showing children that you love your wife and that she loves you and that there is no separation in what Mom says and what Dad says is the best example you could set.You're on your way.

I do have children who will spend summers with me.

Because the landlord sold the house .i explained to them it wasn’t a good idea because I still .had a lot to do.they said had no we’re to go it’s stressful with  children and having a big family and so on and so on.they told me after I was.

If you intend on using FHA again, you of course have the issue of proving that the you either had a material life change warranting a larger property (had children) or you are moving far away for work. 

Your Solo 401k cannot rent properties to disqualified persons (you, your spouse, your parents, grandparents, children, and your grandchildren are examples).This is true whether you manage the rental or a property management company takes care of the logistics.

Usually I’m buying from grown children who are dividing their parents estate.

I don't feel like I have any responsibility for this tenant's children and that it is wholly her responsibility to control her children and pay for the damage. 

We have two children:  a 16-year-old daughter and nine-year-old son. 

He had 4 cars to his household as had older children, and he had to resort to parking in his driveway, which can accommodate 4 cars, but inconvenient.He spoke to the owner and demanded his tenants not park in front of the house, my rental.

While some tenants may act like children at times, I doubt adoption is possible or helpful.