The studio has a swamp cooler and will likely not use much power or gas, so I plan to include about $50 extra per month in rent.

I suspect it's more likely that, like most crises, eventually things calm down and cooler heads prevail, meaning that the EU/UK will not continue to implode for years to come.

Cooler heads always prevail!

If AC is out of the question, what about a "swamp cooler"? 

They will be your BFFs.I've not been impressed with "pro" painters - they don't do a better job than I can & I really can't afford to spend the money.Yes, it's boring - plug yourself in to the ol' iPod, get a cooler full of drinks, some snacks & put your mind in Zen mode.

Franklin County (Columbus) FHA max for a 4plex is $628,500 (https://entp.hud.gov/idapp/html/hicost1.cfm) so you would still have capital for more investments.

I would obviously need water lines, gas, grease trap, 25-30 ft of hood space, 2 restrooms, a full kitchen area with drains, a full bar with beer lines, coolers, etc.

But it would be cooler if I could click on a "RoR" or "Cap Rate of X" and Maximus does the analysis and shows me where to invest.

So if we do our last-minute verification of employment 2 days before the loan funds, and you've put two weeks notice in, or if the person who answers is Sally the receptionist who you told of your plan to quit your job around the water cooler last week and she tells the assistant underwriter this, then the loan will not fund at all (or, best case, it'll close late and be a stressful week or two, as you've by this point typically released all contingencies).Post closing audits are about the snapshot in time immediately prior to, and at, loan funding.

I welcome a cooler housing market then we've had.