Third, if you don't know the caller, let it go to voicemail and if neither of those work, file a 2nd mortgage lien, payable to you for an amount 5x the value of your home. 

However, I am unsure on how to go about finding the proper handyman/maintenance guy/management team to help run any out-of-state investments I make.

That may increase your cost or limit the coverage you can get.The Year that the following were updated (either partially or fully) would be good to know:- Heating systems- Roof- Plumbing- electricalSome companies will not write properties with systems that have not been updated.As long as you are living there, the proper policy for a 1-4 family is a "Homeowners" policy.

4) Payoff Rental Mortgage: super conservative option.

Debt Reduction - at the very least, another human being is paying down your mortgage and increasing your equity.

We're working with a mortgage broker local to us and he has put us in contact with Lendbase as well.

These properties cover my mortgage, allow me to save for maintenance/repairs, and are projected to be worth $7–9 million by retirement.

Trying to balance proper due diligence against my desire to just acquire a bunch of mediocre units!  

Which I know from being in other business that that does not look good to clients if I have to cancel showing or if I don’t show for showing and pay someone else to show my house I think you can pull it off as long as you set expectations properly with clients upfront and especially if you’re working with people you already know, like other fire fighters for example will be fine with your unpredictable schedule.

While the 4% mortgage is great, your 1M in dead equity isn't giving you a great return.