He also must have been peeing on the air conditioner unit because there is a triangle on each corner where the fins are all gone - eaten up by the acidic urine! 

It's about $500 plus $150 if you want them to throw in 10 gal of acid (which you will want that).

The cheapest option (other than nothing) would be to make a cut in the middle and remove the old, then acid stain the driveway so it all matches. 

That's a good test Don, like an acid test.

Your on the right track, boric acid, traps.

Yes, I understand that the 2% rule is a quick and dirty acid test, not a proforma, but I'm curious how ya'll use it practically in different scenarios.

I use 50% water and 50% muriatic acid, pour it directly on the top of the stove, on top of the inside of the oven door and inside the oven and I can make the worse-looking stove in the world look like it just came out of the box in less than 20 minutes.As for the rest of every unit we clean we always clean inside the toilet bowl with muriatic acid and we make the worse-looking toilet look brand new within a few minutes.

But now that agent has to put it back up for sale and waste days on market which is essentially ACID to the price of the home. 

Another remedy that I read about was using commercial grade vinegar 15% , it is acidic and will kill the bamboo , but it cost $ 600 per 55 gallons .

With no exception, the pet occupied units get much dirtier filters (which I personally change once every 30 days), and the coils needing acid washing much more frequently.