LOL.. so it will depend on what your towing how the wind resistance is.. but anything less than say 100 miles   with the truck with the TRI motor and 500 range  Range anxiety will not come into play I bet. 

It seems like a HELOC may be the least path of resistance, but I'm open other ideas. 

If I were in your spot, I'd try to find some sort of W2 income and resist the urge to try to live off of cash flow from real estate.

Be prepared for the long haul and resist giving up.

The 10-year-old house on the other hand may be getting to the point where the HWH needs to be replaced, the exterior needs paint, the fir (cheaper than cedar but not decay-resistant) trim boards are starting to show rot as the caulk cracks, the builder-grade windows are fogged and the skylights are leaking.

I get it, moving sucks but I still think it's the path of least resistance. 

I’d start there.From there just make like a ninja and swipe the deal...sorry couldn’t resist.

I resisted the temptation to show why it was a poor investment because it will work for their primary purpose.  

So for many counties I've dealt with, a DIY perc test involves knowing the soils, soil colors, how to identify oxidation in soil, knowing the county soil survey description and how it applies.

saw this & couldn't resist posting it :)