Congrats!!! I remember getting my first deal - I felt the same way! And of course, if you sell your contract you will see it through to the close, so naturally you will be helping the seller, who you obviously care about. Here's my input on your questions:
1) where do I get a purchase and sale agreement WITH an "and/or assign" clause? ... I'm in GA, so my contracts might be different. I got mine from an experienced investor who I split my first three deals with. It was so good to have someone with "skin in the game" to call during the whole process.
2) when I present it to the owner, do I just give him an earnest deposit in his hand? I was told u can give as little as $10. How do I record such deposit? .... I rarely give EM, but maybe that's required in NJ? If you do give it, it should be recorded on the contract. The signature verifies that it happened.
3) once he accepts the offer (hopefully), then do I send purchase agreement to my Title company ? ...We use attorneys here. Yes, I send the agreement to them to pull the title work and do the prep for closing.
4) then do I shop the deal around?... I think you can start networking and finding cash buyers now. Why wait? To market the specific property, though, yes - shop it around with pictures, videos, comps, repair estimates, the works, once you have the contract.
5) here is the big twist! The owner said he will need about 60 days to move all his stuff and find a new place to stay. Can this time be given to him for this type of transactions? Will a cash buyer be willing to wait that long? Was thinking to tell the owner that he will be responsible for the taxes as long as he stays in the home. .... This is fine for him to select the closing date. It gives you even more time to market the deal! If the deal is good for the buyer now, it will still be good in two month unless something crazy happens in the market. Yes, the owner will need to keep paying the taxes.
6) how can I protect myself from being swindled if the cash buyer wants to see the house, which mostly he/she will. Will the owner and the cash buyer just try to deal with each other even though I brought them together .... your contract protects you, and your relationship with both people. You can make sure your buyer is a serious and capable investor by requiring proof of funds or preapproval for the purchase price (for hard money) prior to allowing them access.
Hope this helps! You are awesome for taking action! Let the games begin!