Hi Adam,
I appreciate your giving more detail into your situation. Based on some addition "miscommunication" in your most recent response, I have to say, this isn't as much of an issue of Hard vs Private money. When you use words like "Ridiculous Rates", you are being very derogatory towards lenders. I have to believe your negative attitude comes out when you tlo potential lenders. And, I'm actually a little surprised you're not getting a lot more backlash here too.
You are welcome to stay away from Hard Money (which I realize you said you don't want to talk about any more - I imagine it's because you realize how wrong you are and don't want to get beat up for it). It's your right. It's also your right to think we are all scum (you didn't say that - I just get that feeling).
The point you are missing is that ridiculous rates are all relative to the project. As a business owner, you should be looking for the best solution to the problem. Sometimes that will be private money and other times it will be hard money. If you completely ignore one of the two tools available to you, you will likely miss out on a lot of opportunity.
To me, this is a mental/attitude issue for you. You've formed an opinion and you refuse to consider that you're wrong. That's OK. But don't go around bashing on others because you don't agree with them or you think they're too expensive. As you grow, you're going to find that there are private lenders who have ridiculous rates as well (maybe you already have and that's part of why you're not finding what you want). Why are the rates higher, because your dealing with people who truly understand the risk. Unfortunately, it sounds like you're only considering your side of the equation and only thinking about how much money you're going to make. A good lender is your financial partner in the deal and they should have a right to make a profit as well. It's unfortunate that you think you should be able to control that (by telling us we're too expensive, you are trying to limit our ability to fairly charge rates and fees based on the real risk - not just your version of it).
As to your question about private lenders...
It doesn't matter what kind of lender you want. If you can't find someone who is willing to lend you money despite your willingness to pledge the other properties, this should be a huge red flag for you.
I'm guessing that it's one of three issues...
1. Your project is a lot higher risk than you are giving it credit for being.
2. Your negative attitude towards rates you feel are too expensive is bleeding through into your conversation.
3. How you're presenting the deal is massively flawed. You're either making the deal all about you and why they should give you the money or the offer you're making is at a ridiculously low interest rate. Sorry. The blade swings both ways.
If you want someone to lend you money, you need to flexible and negotiate. Negotiation is not the art of you getting the best/cheapest rates for the loan. Really good negotiation is finding out what the other person wants and giving it to them in a way that still works for you. Negotiation is just the fancy sales word for compromise.
The thing you have to keep in mind, if you are going to deal with a private lender, is that the most important question they have when lending money is... How will I get paid back? It's not how much they're going to make. And, it's not about how much you're going to make.
Assuming that you're right and the project is a good one and the collateral you offer is good, then it's you. It's the only thing left. You have to show them why it's good for them. In other words, it's all about them; not you. Figure out how to be a better salesperson. Figure out what the lenders want. Don't make the deal about you at all. You need to show people why it's a good deal for THEM. If it's not, you're dead. Other than your ability to get the job done, your profit and your success don't really matter that much. However, your attitudes and perceptions do. Your private lenders can feel them. If they bleed into the conversation, you're dead in the water. You have to give them a reason to want to know, like & trust you. Based on how you wrote your original post and your response, you need to work on your presentation skills. Your word choice is very abrasive and off putting. It's easier to attract bees with honey than a hammer.
Understand, my comments aren't meant to beat you up. They're meant to point out some things that I think will help you. Some of the things (based on how you come across in your posts) that need improvement are in your attitude and presentation. They're hard to hear sometimes. But, we all have trouble with this sometimes. We all need to be reminded that it's not about us.
Zig Ziglar said it best... "You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want."
This is the crux of all private money (and hard money too).
I truly wish you the best of luck. I hope you're able to take the constructive criticism and use it to better yourself and your offer.
Good luck.
