@Jim K.
Interesting question that I've been confronting a lot lately. My kids are 20, 18, and 18. They've known their entire life that I would not be paying for their college, but would allow them to stay home for free (I'm even giving up my office so they can have their own rooms, which is a bummer! haha).
They've all been working since 16 and between work, birthday gifts, and mutual fund growth, they've got about 40k, 20k, and 20k and paid off cars. I will say that I did manage to turn a couple grand of birthday gifts from grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. into around 10k for them. So, I didn't really give them any money, but I did help their money grow pretty effectively and I'm giving them the gift of free room and board through college as mentioned.
This has always been my plan for my children and I've taken a lot of guff for it over the years. I could easily afford to pay for college and most people don't understand why I won't. It's hard watching them burn both ends of the candle and knowing that they could've gone to "better" schools, but I wouldn't change it as I am so proud of who they are.
In the end, they should inherit a lot more than I did. I don't think leaving them money is my job though. I think teaching them to get their own money is...