What consists of a good mentor?

Question

I keep hearing, "get a mentor, get a mentor!"  But really how do you get one and what qualifies as a good mentor?  Do I have to do what he says, what if personalities clash or his views are not mine after a while, when that mentor has invested his time?  What sort of good or bad experiences have you guys had with mentors?

Arktavious Sally · Answer

Addiel Flores A good mentor will definitely shorten the learning curve, however its not really necessary when you have great forums like bigger pockets. I would recommend that you partner with other wholesalers in you market and see how they put deals together. Some wholesalers fear competition and will be cautious about teaching you to wholesale in the same market. If you do find a mentor just make sure they are actually doing deals and will be committed to your success.

Addiel Flores · Answer

Yes, totally agree Randy F. I've been using the colleague request for people who I want to work  with and the following for people whom I want to learn from.  I've been receiving requests for colleagues who would like to work with me but don't have the experience, so I consider that to be me the mentor, which I take that role to be very important ! I get to make a difference in someone's life! Thanks for the tip Randy!

Randy F. · Answer

It seems to me that a great approach to finding the right mentor is to use BP's "collegue request" feature.

The more time I spend on these pages, the more certain individuals stand out. For me, they are those who provide well written, concise, logical answers without injecting alot of ego into it. Those you feel on the same wavelength with, you could shoot a "colleage request", and use the message feature to begin developing a relationship.

Its no different than investing, in that due diligence reduces the potential of jumping in without all the info required to make an informed decision. Rather than wasting your time, and tha of a prospective mentor, "follow" those that stand out from the crowd and when comfortable doing so, make contact by "request" and take it from there.

Its very important to remember though, that everyone is here by choice and are offering their knowledge and experience out of the kindness of their hearts. Not something to take for granted or put unrealistic expectations upon. Prolly didnt need to say that... But I said it anyway!

Anyway!... Good luck!

Addiel Flores · Answer

thanks!! Mike H. I actually wanted to hear that, the fact that mentors should not dictate... BiggerPockets is really teaching me a lot!

Mike H. · Answer

To me. The definition of a good mentor is someone that has experience and has had some success. You don't want to learn from someone thats gone bankrupt. Their model didn't work. Find someone that has a model that you're trying to follow (i.e. buy and hold? Flipping? Wholesaling?, etc) and that has done it successfully over a period of time (at least 2 or 3 years).

Also, a mentor shouldn't be dictating to you what to do. They should be giving you suggestions and sharing tips and tricks that they've picked up along the way. They should be there to answer any questions you have and point you in the right direction.

If they see any pitfalls you might be approaching, they should give you a heads up. But they shouldn't be giving you ultimatums.

Ultimately, you have to be the one that makes the final decisions on your deals. You're the one thats going to have to live with the results.

Here's an example of something good. Had a friend that was doing his first deal and one of his trade guys quotes came in what seemed a little high but what was still the best number of the bunch. I told him to counter the guy with the number he thought was fair and see if the guy would meet it.  If he didn't, then accept his original bid anyway and go with him. Contractor met his number and the buddy saved money.

Thats the kind of thing a mentor should do. Helpful suggestions of things sometimes people just don't think of - especially when they're doing their first big rehab. You just don't know what you don't know.

Also, sometimes the beginner has the right idea and just doesn't have the confidence they're right. More than not, thats the case. But its good to have that piece of mind when you're seeing 20k go out the door in rehab. :-)

What consists of a good mentor?

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