What do you do when your spouse is not on board with investing?

Question

My wife is not on board with buying a rehab unit to update and force Equity in the property. She wants turn key. In our market with what she is looking for we can not afford. We will have a liability not an asset. So I told her we need to buy a two family and use the extra income for the property she wants. Now it has been come hard to find it to Family because she still is looking for an updated unit. What advice or help can you guys give me to get her on the same page on investing in a property for the future. ￼￼￼

Mike Dymski · Answer

Tell her that she married a fixer upper husband; so, she has the proven courage to do the same with a house...

Dennis M. · Answer

If she’s apprehensive now wait till she sees you dealing with trying to keep your head above water and the daily struggles of tenants toilets and trash ! Point is it’s not going to get easier after you buy the property that’s for sure . You’ll need grit and iron will to succeed . Don’t force her into it . Look Your the leader of the house your the man so lead . Show her you have done the research and your willing to do what it takes to achieve the goal and just start .

Terrell Garren · Answer

Maybe have her read "Turnkey Dad, Cat Urine Dad" Turnkey Dad makes no money off the purchase, pays a premium for turn key, makes an 8% RIO, and develops few additional skills and experience. Cat Urine Dad buys a stinker, builds 40% equity by doing repairs, makes 15% ROI, develops contractor relationship and rehab skills that carry over to future projects. Not to mention the great feeling accomplishment. BTW, my favorite smell is that of pet urine in a property for sale

John Morgan · Answer

@Korey RansonMy wife was on board with our first investment property we bought 5 years ago. It was a turnkey and looked amazing from day one. She was proud of this one. However, it wasn’t cash flowing that well. At least I had her on board. Then I bought another nice turn key in a good area that cash flowed a few hundred a month. Not great, not bad. Then I did the math and figured out older beat up SFRs were the way to go. She definitely wasn’t on board with me buying the next six ugly houses in C class hoods. This caused problems in my marriage for a couple years..especially when things would break. They cash flowed much better and are appreciating so much more due to being starter type homes. I rehabbed a couple really ugly ones in the last year that have done well for me. One I paid only 48k for and now rents for 1400/month. The other one I paid 135k cash for and did a BRRRR on it which got appraised for 215k and rents for $1,675/mo. I was able to get 150k out of that BRRRR and bought another old beater (with the free money) for 132k. I’ll probably do another BRRRR on this new property when the wife is on board. The key for me with getting my wife somewhat on board with buying rentals is to not spend time on the properties. I hire everything out and rarely ever go over to them. My wife’s happiness with me around her and the family is more important to my marriage than trying to save a buck by running over to the props and doing things myself. I’m up to 8 rentals by doing this hands off approach and she seems cool with it finally. The positive cash flow with these 8 properties is over 3k and she is finally seeing the value of real estate investing. But the first couple years wasn’t fun trying to convince her how I planned on doing this.

Caleb Heimsoth · Answer

@Korey Ranson. Get your wife on board or don’t invest, that’s my advice. You both need to be on the same page or this won’t work

Theresa Harris · Answer

Turn it around and ask her how you will come out ahead with the turnkey house she chose. Get her to do the math may make her see it differently than you telling her the numbers don't work.

Kyle Shankin · Answer

@Korey Ranson As others have already stated, go through the analysis process with your wife. If she's not interested in that, then give her the important numbers in some form that she can look at. Maybe being able to see where the challenges are with turn-key will allow her to start thinking about other solutions. You can also ask her why she thinks turn key is best and have her defend her decision. Or if she agrees that the numbers don't work, ask her what she thinks a good solution would be. She may come up with something brilliant! On the other hand, have you considered checking alternate markets? If you could find a turn-key deal elsewhere, would that be worth investing in to you?

Michael Noto · Answer

@Korey Ranson This is a challenging situation for sure and I have clients who have experienced similar things with spouses. In the end if they are not on board then it will be a constant struggle because like @Dennis M. mentioned the day to day of owning/managing rental real estate is what most spouses look at as the inconvenience. In your case it sounds as though the type of property is what you aren't seeing eye to eye on. How much more would you have to save to purchase what she wants or even something closer to the middle in terms of condition? That may be an option.

James Wise · Answer

Happy Wife = Happy Life

Craig Jeppesen · Answer

My wife has a hard time seeing the potential. She just sees a dump. We have built a few houses As well and she can’t picture the house until Sheetrock is in. Your wife has to look past the ugly carpet and cabinets and see the end result or has to trust that you can see that. Ask her to trust you and show her what you can do to make a dump into a really nice place where people will want to live.