Getting called a "slumlord" by friends and family

Getting called a "slumlord" by friends and family

Real Estate Professional · Las Vegas, NV · Member since 2013 · 225 posts · 74 votes

I bought 2 triplexes in blue collar areas. I am very good landlord, I always fix things on time. I'll do extra stuff - for example last week it came down to repair the fridge or buying a new one. I went with buying a new one. 

What I've found is that some friends and family call me a slumlord. I'm not sure why, but this really hurts me. I'm not sure if I'm being too sensitive. I can understand their perspective - how could a 30 year old own 2 triplexes (we live in a high cost city)?

I usually just ignore them, but I'm thinking about debating them on it. 

Does anyone have any perspective on this? I'm not sure if this is the typical post in the forum but I'm sure others have faced it before. 

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Laguna Beach, CA · Member since 2014 · 263 posts · 140 votes
11y

When the opinions of others matter to you, ask yourself some questions.  What impact does their opinion have on the things I choose to do?  What is the reason I choose to get upset about what another person says to me?

Every person has opinions and is entitled to their opinion.  The good news is that you always have choices.  You get to choose to respond or not.  You get to choose the manner and tone of your response.  This really boils down to taking a look at how much control you exercise over your self.  Who is in control when something someone said causes you to feel hurt?

Words are powerful, but a person in control of their own mind is more powerful.  Take a look at your higher mental faculties and learn more about your marvelous mind.  If you have questions, please feel free to ask.

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  • Investor · Leander, TX · Member since 2015 · 44 posts · 26 votes
    11y

    Yes, ignore them. Why listen to ignorant people who have no clue about being a landlord, or investing in general. Just keep going and invest in more properties. Stop listening to folks who love to destroy dreams and you are on the right track. 

    Family in my estimation are the worst and they ought to be ashamed of themselves.

    Maybe they are just jealous and don't have the balls to do what you have done. 

    But don't waste your breath debating them. What good would that do. They will see they have you rattled. Just go and do your own thing.

    Good luck.

  • Rental Property Investor · Marianna Florida · Member since 2011 · 357 posts · 169 votes
    11y

    They wish they had what you have - plain and simple

  • Urbana, IL · Member since 2012 · 1k+ posts · 425 votes
    11y

    I still haven't told my parents how much I'm invested in real estate and I'm completely expecting them to think what I'm doing is taking advantage of people and being a slum lord. My parents are both don't understand business and entrepreneurship nor risk associated with investing and its always frustrating to have conversations with them.

    When the time comes, I'm planning to default to my strongest argument which is that I'm providing affordable housing for people that other wise couldn't have a place they could call their own. I'm providing a roof over a family that is their own home using seller financing. I'm happy to be doing a service for such a family and glad to be part of a solution to the growing problem of unaffordable living. 

  • Investor · Waconia, MN · Member since 2014 · 238 posts · 104 votes
    11y

    @Alex Silang I think you need to work on letting go of it bothering you. In fact you should take it as a compliment. They are jealous or envious and insulting or mocking is the way they deal with it. I have been getting called that as well by my friends. I just play into because I know that I keep my properties in excellent condition. We are in similar positions as I own 2 duplexes and just flipped a house to buy the 6-plex that I close on end of July!

    Take it as a compliment, I am sure you are doing more than they are for your financial future.

  • Laguna Beach, CA · Member since 2014 · 263 posts · 140 votes
    11y

    When the opinions of others matter to you, ask yourself some questions.  What impact does their opinion have on the things I choose to do?  What is the reason I choose to get upset about what another person says to me?

    Every person has opinions and is entitled to their opinion.  The good news is that you always have choices.  You get to choose to respond or not.  You get to choose the manner and tone of your response.  This really boils down to taking a look at how much control you exercise over your self.  Who is in control when something someone said causes you to feel hurt?

    Words are powerful, but a person in control of their own mind is more powerful.  Take a look at your higher mental faculties and learn more about your marvelous mind.  If you have questions, please feel free to ask.

  • Investor · Leander, TX · Member since 2015 · 44 posts · 26 votes
    11y

    Well if you didn't do it, Steven, somebody else would. So you might as well press on and offer a good service. To me, its a win/win situation. Just as long as you take care of your tenants then everything will work out nicely.

    You can't compensate for your parents shortcomings. That's their problem, not yours.

    Maybe they are trying to protect you in a weird way and they don't want you to fail. I got that from my dad, but that's not realistic. 

    Failure comes with success. You can't hit a home run all the time. Don't beat yourself up on this. Just be glad you took the initiative to make a better life for yourself.

    Don't give up on your dreams. Ignore all this negative crap that we are fed everyday.

  • Investor · Madison, WI · Member since 2015 · 128 posts · 33 votes
    11y

    All these people saying ignore it and what not. Yeah you have tried doing that and yet, it led you to making a thread on a forum about it...

    I say....Debate them!! I don't really ever get into debates or arguments about the whole rei career path or whatever (must be too new to it), but bet your *** if I do, I have a huge arsenal of FACTS that I can throw at them. Mix those facts with some high class vocabulary and dramatization and BOOM! Tell them to sit down. 

    It's kind of like a buddy of mine one time was getting picked on because he was a lifeguard a local swimming pool. Not exactly a prestigious position. However, his argument was, "I SAVE LIVES- I GUARD LIFE, ETC" We all know the position is not as intense as he is making it seem but at the end of the day he was right. In the event of a drowning he would be the one to save a life. That doesn't really go hand in hand with your situation but I hope you see what I'm getting at.

    If you do debate, it is up to you to change the persons perspective on the topic. I would have 1 go at it with prepared comebacks and rebuttals and if they still call you that, THEN ignore them because it is their ignorance that is at fault. 

  • Rental Property Investor · Houston, TX · Member since 2013 · 476 posts · 294 votes
    11y

    “Haters don't really hate you, they hate themselves;  because you're a reflection of what they wish to be” 

    Haters gonna hate!

    In reality, I think a lot of non-REI folks use slumlord as a general reference to being a landlord...they don't necessarily use it in reference to you being a poor landlord. Simply put, slumlord = landlord in their mind and the term slumlord isn't derogatory to them.

    It's the complete opposite for us, landlords, especially ones who have seen true slumlords at work and providing a disservice to both tenants and the quality landlords that take decent care of their properties & tenants.

    It's all good, keep grinding.  If people aren't poking you a bit, making comments, hating, etc...you're doing something wrong!

  • Rental Property Investor · Closter, NJ · Member since 2015 · 884 posts · 722 votes
    11y

    When I first started investing in real estate family members used to call me a slumlord. Flash forward 20 years and a nice big real estate portfolio, they don't mock me any more!

  • Real Estate Agent · Southington, CT · Member since 2008 · 5k+ posts · 3k+ votes
    11y
    Just ignore them. Take the high road. The same people will either be asking you for money or looking to give you money to invest for them some day. They poke fun to get a reaction out of you. Don't give them the satisfaction.
  • Real Estate Agent · Virginia Beach, VA · Member since 2012 · 2k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    11y

    If it's friends and family, I'd simply go with stupid humor, like "Yes, some day I hope to be the best slumlord there is," or "Not yet, but I'm trying."  Eventually, once they realize they aren't pushing buttons, they'll move on to something else like how poorly they think you're raising your children.    

  • Investor · Carmel, IN · Member since 2014 · 332 posts · 245 votes
    11y

    Next time you are at the bank depositing the rent checks, send a text message to those friends and ask them "What are you doing right now?". 

  • Dawn AnastasiPro Member
    Rental Property Investor · Milwaukee, WI · Member since 2013 · 6k+ posts · 4k+ votes
    11y

    Perhaps ask them, "What does it mean to be a slumlord?" You might be interested by their answer.

    They Called Me a Slumlord

  • Linda WeygantPro Member
    Investor and CPA · Arvada, CO · Member since 2015 · 2k+ posts · 3k+ votes
    11y

    I usually laugh a little, then say "but actually..."

  • Property Manager · Livonia, MI · Member since 2011 · 4k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    11y
  • Joel OwensBusiness Member
    Moderator
    Real Estate Broker · Canton, GA · Member since 2010 · 15k+ posts · 11k+ votes
    11y

    When I first went into real estate about 12 years ago I remember the broker training us in license class.

    She was a very successful broker and said the class teaches you enough to pass the test and make you dangerous and then you get into the real world. She also said people will have many opinions and you will hear many things over your career.

    She said just imagine you have WD-40 on your shoulders and what goes in one ear comes out the other and then rolls away like a tumbleweed in the desert.

    The stuff people say has no bearing on me these days. I work my business plan for my life, my own investments, etc.

    20 years from now I will be proud of what I have created. Many of the people with opinions will still be complaining about how life isn't fair and ONE DAY ( lol ! ) they will get what is coming to them............... : )

    You create what you want in life. 90% of the population are just too lazy to go out and make it happen with no excuses.

  • Investor · lansing, MI · Member since 2015 · 29 posts · 18 votes
    11y

    "They don't pay your bills, and They don't have your dreams"  Grant Cardone

  • Investor · Sherman Oaks, CA · Member since 2008 · 6k+ posts · 3k+ votes
    11y

    I train Real Estate Investors and one of the biggest problems is that they are too sensitive in the beginning.

    If you're not an entrepreneur and you coming from corporate life, you have been truly conditioned to believe a certain way of life. 

    You got a job, you work hard, and you make a success from your job, climb a ladder, be a success

    My background is 1099 paid insurance brokerage 

    if you don't sell you don't eat. 

    You're too worried about your marketing being effective to care at all about what people think of you

    Imagine having 20 units that are free and clear bringing in 1000 a month each. 

    Again, 10 free and clear units that are bringing in 1000 a month each.

    Have 10,000 a month coming in; Don't give a sh*t what anybody thinks

  • Boise, ID · Member since 2013 · 45 posts · 18 votes
    11y

    @Alex Silang,

    What do your tenants say?

    What does your bank account say?

    What does your conscience say?

    ----  Those are the only things you should be listening to.  If there is any bad feedback from those sources- then you need to listen, and act...

    I bet you're doing fine...

    I've been doing this for about 1 1/2 years- I get the same stuff.  I do think most people are too scared to do it themselves, and jealous of anyone who is doing it.  Also- everyone's a self appointed expert- and love to give you input when they don't have any risk/skin in the game.  Sadly, I find most of their "education" is from reality fricken TV, or "I knew this one guy who......" type stories...

    I'm happy (and thankful) that most of my knowledge was found here on biggerpockets- much better source of info than negative people...

    If you're doing good things- keep doing good things!  If you're not doing good things- change/fix it!

    Jimmy

  • Investor · Isabel, KS · Member since 2015 · 247 posts · 85 votes
    11y

    just let it go. I've had that said to me many times, mostly I can tell they are poking fun at me about it, but if you stop for a minute you migh wonder, so I don't stop for a minute so it won't sit in my mind. I know I do the best I can at any given point in time to make the best decision and it's usually not what's best for my pocket book but what's best for the tenant, future tenants, cost wise, the asset or order of operations (is the elec infrastructure present to support HVAC vs window air etc. etc) then it's about my pocket book. I just know if I do a good job then tenants are happy, units rent or stay rented, asset increases in value and I will be part of the win win in there.

    You bought em, so run em, make a difference, and be happy!!

  • Investor · Bolton, MA · Member since 2012 · 133 posts · 72 votes
    11y

    It is understandable that your feelings are hurt.  In my real job, maid service owner, a client accused me of just worrying about the bottom line and not her as a consumer.  Which is so  far from the reality of how I run my business. I did  actually cry because I  was so hurt.  That was 3 weeks ago and after feeling bad about it,  I smile now because it was her loss .

    The premise of the story is that even if you run your business, land lording or maid service, with the highest degree of integrity there is always going to be  people that find fault with it. Do not lose the faith and keep on keeping on!

  • Curtis YoderPro Member
    Rental Property Investor · Tulsa, OK · Member since 2014 · 241 posts · 187 votes
    11y

    Ten years ago a portion of my family made jokes about my houses I had purchased. They are now asking how they can get in on it... Let them keep investing in the markets and see who retires first. You. Enjoy!

  • Residential Real Estate Agent · Atlanta, GA · Member since 2009 · 381 posts · 134 votes
    11y

    People always want you to follow the path that they follow and do the things they do. Get a education, get a job, work hard, be secure, retire well.  Crazy!

    Love your family and find some new "like minded friends".

  • Los Angeles, CA · Member since 2015 · 59 posts · 8 votes
    11y

    Whatevs. I've been called things by lots of people. How many real estate deals have they done? I invest in distressed houses and usually owner finance them on 30 year notes. I love what I do. 

  • Real Estate Broker · Indianapolis, IN · Member since 2014 · 3k+ posts · 2k+ votes
    11y

    I think a lot of this comes down to you having a different perspective. For them "slum lords" means your properties aren't somewhere they would live. This shows pride/entitlement on their part. Where as to us slumlord is an A%$ who profits off of the poor trapping them in poor housing. 

    I had someone close to me one time tell me that my REI was a hobby. I don't think I have been more pissed off. But..... To them.... That's all they see. They don't know I'm dropping thousands of pieces of mail a month and talking to dozens of sellers a week. In just a few years I will have thousands of dollars of passive income rolling in and my "hobby" is gonna make their hobbies look like crap.

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