Bipolar Tenant...I hit the crazy lottery!

[Isaac S.]

I'm posting to vent and maybe get some advice. I have a tenant that I have realized is Bipolar and has some serious mood swings and gets very negative verbally attacking me.

She has one of my more challenging units that is street level, with all the living room windows right out on to the sidewalk with no setback/yard. So, people can look into the unit if the windows or blinds are open, also, you can hear cars parking(loud stereos), random homeless people walking by talking to themselves, the dumpster being rolled out and emptied M,W,F etc. basically all the little special joys of living in dense urban environment. So, it's not like there isn't things to dislike or be frustrated with, but, very few that I can actually control or change.

also, the building occasionally has some petty theft of packages. The doors close lock properly, but occasionally people get buzzed in or follow a tenant in, despite the fact we constantly send out reminder letters about building security and best practices.

We have security cameras and are actively involved in coordinating withe police and city council members.

Still every time something happens this one tenant acts like its my fault and then leaves a bunch of messages about what horrible person I am and how badly I manage the place, etc,etc. Mind you, when she is a good mood, she is asking me to hire her as an assistant because she is interested in RE.

She always ends up apologizing later, but, it's starting to really get on my nerves. I have given her the " if you feel that way, you should move." ultimatum. She just back pedals and eventually calms down and apologizes when she is not in that mood swing.

I'm just getting annoyed at the occasional full fledged assault on my character, like I'm some kind of emotional punching bag.

[Patricia Steiner]

I have a slightly different take on this:  it's your fault.  When she pulled this tantrum stuff on you the first time, you didn't end it there.  And, now that this is a common and repeated event with her, you feel like a punching bag.  You never should have been "the bag" in the first place.  Tenants have the right to the peaceful use of their rental..."peaceful" doesn't mean silent - but normal for it's location.  I recommend that you send her a letter/email (have it in writing) and be factual; one thing that emotional people can't emote over are facts.  Advise her that:

1.  All future contact must be submitted via email.  (And, then block her; enforce this boundary).

2.  Any activity that she deems is criminal in nature is to be immediately reported to the police - not you.  Remind her that you have provided security measures like cameras and a secure entry but it is the tenant's responsibility to ensure that the entry is secure and that police are notified of criminal issues.

3.  You recommend that she keep her blinds closed to ensure her privacy.  Point out that the location "is what it is" and remind her that most people embrace the urban vibe and find ways to create their personal, peaceful space.  You hope she will do the same and enjoy "the remaining time on your lease." 

Sign your name and be done.

And, I don't think she's Bipolar...I think she's an immature, entitled, manipulative brat - an emotional vampire. Get off her roller coaster and stay off.  She may escalate her rant to get your attention after receiving the letter - don't take the bait. Don't respond to inappropriate behavior. Once she knows that you're no longer giving her an audience, she will stop.  

She's not worth your time and attention - so don't give it to her.  (And, FYI...I know this because "I've been there, done that" repeatedly. I finally realized that I was enabling it so now I refuse to engage in it at all.  Horrified them, freed me!)