Eviction Language for Leases

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We all know there are good renters out there. I want to talk about the ones that aren't.

9 out of 10 people being evicted don't show up in court to their eviction hearing. That's what I've heard, is that about right?

I was evicted twice in my youth, both times because I just moved and then didn't pay the remaining balances. Years later when I cleaned up my credit, boy did I pay.

Once of those evictions turned into a Garnishment. They got all of my tax return too.

How do I put language in my leases to ensure the above happens to every tenant that jumps ship on me. I realize many of late night movers don't live in a credit world, and may never pay their bills. I want their tax returns, I want to garnish their pay.

Additionally, I want there to be big fines for even getting to this process.

"Initial here, saying you understand that if you're evicted, you will charged a $2500.00 Eviction Processing Charge"

Stuff like that. 

I understand you cannot collect rent twice on the same property for the same time period, but I would think there can be expenses. At some people some of these people will attempt to clean up their credit, I want to be standing there with my hand out when they do.

I know it sounds terrible, its just business.