My first direct mail letter and looking for feedback TIA

[Zac Boelkow]

Dear XX:

If you are interested or ever decide to sell your investment property, 5428 ABC ST, please let me know. I am open to negotiating a fair price with you for your property. I have helped other investors minimize risk, expenses, and fees through the sale of their property. By working together, we can net great results that is mutually beneficial for everyone involved.

My name is Zachary Boelkow, I am your neighbor, and own 5444 ABC ST. I am an honest and sincere investor with 10+ years’ experience and believe I would be a good owner for your property listed above.

Thank You,

Zac Boelkow

999-999-9999

[Calvin Pringles]

I think it looks good! Are you specifically targeting neighborhoods that you own property in? It's a great point of conversation being able to refer to past neighbors you've worked with or properties that you currently own.

[Yael Lederman]

I would switch up the order slightly and lead with the piece about you being their neighbor. You want to establish credibility and trust to keep them reading!

[Zac Boelkow]

Quote from @Calvin Pringles:

I think it looks good! Are you specifically targeting neighborhoods that you own property in? It's a great point of conversation being able to refer to past neighbors you've worked with or properties that you currently own.

 yes I own in this specific neighborhood and looking to buy the surrounding duplexes in this neighborhood

[Zac Boelkow]

Quote from @Yael Lederman:

I would switch up the order slightly and lead with the piece about you being their neighbor. You want to establish credibility and trust to keep them reading!

 Thank you, I had it that way, and then switched up to start with the benefits to them first. I struggled with this. Build rapport and introduction or give them their benefits first and foremost...

[Zac Boelkow]

Also, I hate the word "fair" but think most others will appreciate the word "fair"?

[Calvin Pringles]

Quote from @Zac Boelkow:

Also, I hate the word "fair" but think most others will appreciate the word "fair"?

 fair is subjective, maybe use a better subjective word like "good", or "acceptable"?

[Amy Heitner]

Dear XX:

If you are interested in selling or ever decide to sell your investment property, 5428 ABC ST, please let me know. I am open to negotiating a fair price with you for your property. I have helped other investors minimize risk, expenses, and fees through the sale of their property. By working together, we can net (do you want to say net or get?) great results that are mutually beneficial for everyone involved.

My name is Zachary Boelkow, I am your neighbor and own 5444 ABC ST. I am an honest and sincere investor with 10+ years of experience, and believe I would be a good owner for your property listed above.

Thank You,

Zac Boelkow

999-999-9999

Go for it @Zac Boelkow, wishing you all success!

[Account Closed]

Do you see good success with direct mail? Looks good!