Stressed, thoughts on direction so I don't blow my wad of cash

[Matthew W.]

My wad of cash. 

I am 46 and have saved $200K-$250K in liquid cash.  I've been saving up to get into passive income investing. I already max out my 401K, my Roth, and own 1 rental property (my previous primary) and have an emergency fund.   I now want to get to the "next level" and feel if I play my cards right (invest this wisely) I could actually get there.

But while many would be very happy in my situation, I am completely stressed out!!!  I can not afford to buy a primary home where I live (SF), or where I want to live (Los Angeles), nor does it seem to make any sense anyway if I do the math using the tools and info i found in here.   Granted I am new at this, so might be missing bigger picture stuff. 

I do NOT want to be tied up in the whims of the game of the stock market. I have a hard time trusting anyone, and available advice is often conflicting, making me even more reserved. So the way I figure I have the following options:

1) Buy 1 income property in a decent area ($500K+) somewhere and hope for the best and appreciation
2) Buy 2 properties in less ideal locations and rent them
3) Spread out the money across crowd source investing in $25K increments  (e.g. crowdstreet, realtyshare)
4) Invest in alternative investments like life settlements, bridge loans/peer to peer etc. also in $25K increments

5) WAIT.  Stay cash strong, as the market cycle is changing!

Please provide some thoughts and guidance on where I should begin.

[Jim K.]

@Matthew W.

All I'll say is that if you can come up with that title, you can certainly shoot with confidence for REI greatness, Matthew.