So, trying to stifle a laugh, I ask him to leave the property as I don't want any issues for my tenants.

There is significant equity in them for me.My new home has very little equity and will not be a rental property when I leave it.

We like to have some type of printout of the property with descriptions and pictures so we can give them something to remember the property when they leave. 

I would leave it to the expert here in BP if they agree or disagree with me. :)

That leaves you with $512.

Every year my tenants tells me they would leave due to kids school situation but staying put.

Then tell them that since they informed you of this ahead of time you are offering them the courtesy of not charging them any lease breaking fees and return their deposit if they move out by the end of the month and leave the rental in good condition.

Give notice of lease infraction, odor of smoke coming from aparment and unauthorized person.. give him a notice that his lease will not be renewed.. and that if the smoking and unauthorized person does not stop you will seek emediate action for eviction action cause of lease violations.Tenant 2. photo's of carpet damage.. and take more action in inspecting the buliding, grounds, listen and look for signs of pets, and pet POOP.. and give the tenant the option to leave/ or pet leaves.. 

And, I suppose that if somebody doesn't like your unit they will leave eventually.

It's important to figure out what your business strategy is, and what your value-add proposition is.I know that folks have been successful in each one of these niches in Philly real estate, just depends on what you are looking to do (in no particular order and just off the top of my head, I'm sure that I'm leaving a bunch out): low-income rentals, luxury rentals, flips, vacant land speculation, new construction, section 8/PHA rentals, wholesaling, wholetailing, bird dogging, turn key sales, property management, construction management, financing expert, zoning expert, title expert, business procedure consulting, hard money lending, seller financing, buying subject-to, syndicating deals, 1031 exchange scout, retail sales, etc.Personally, I've set up a pretty decent rental portfolio over the last few years, that's what made sense for my investing goals and setup.