I realize that on the surface the most practical solution is sticking out my W2, but I'm finding it has been very limiting in terms of the dulling mindset I'm surrounded by (yet I can't listen to podcasts, read, take phone calls, etc), the pay is only average, and love learning new things and have been with this company for a collective 13 years since shortly after college.

Not the $100k/door ones that rent for $1000/unit (or this $300k/door that might rent for $1600/unit)Honestly at these prices I’d likely recommend (if someone asked me) to buy a 5 CAP NNN Walgreens somewhere and collect mailbox money and be done. 

I was impressed.

Along with rent collection issues and of course the 5 to 10k cash back was to be used for reserves.. but 90% of the buyers never thought about reserves and the next thing you know they bought a new Jet ski or car or took a trip.. so that left a lot of very week landlords going into the GFC and well you know the rest of the story foreclosures by the thousands in Detroit investors failing.. double whammy  underwater on mortgage inadequate reserves.

But black matte just gives the impression of 'luxury' to most people viewing it and costs virtually the same as chrome and brushed nickel (which I cannot stand persoally).

One group not to mess with is the IRS and I hear they pay snitches a cut of what they collect in unclaimed wages, maybe the owner can go that route. 

Who is going to mop the floors and collect the quarters?

If you bought a company - with the assets, liabilities - then you would have the right of collection and the joy of being sued for the actions of the past principals.Doesn't starting day 1 sound a whole lot better!

Keep a decent cash reserve for the rainy day but otherwise just keep buying as longs you don't over leverage or buy crappy assets or vanity properties to impress others.

Also if you have a bread butter house most likely you will have dishwasher so will help collect the debris coming from the dishwasher.