Then would he just list on the MLS where he's all but guaranteed to get a much better price given how crazy real estate is out here?

LV made the most sense to me because I personally like the neighborhood already and it was the lowest cost of entry with an all-but-guaranteed profit.

SDIRAs have a TON of their own rules, one being that there can be no 'personal guarantees' such as credit cards want you to sign, and no reimbursing to your personal accounts either.... so what to do?

A contract doesn't guarantee anything.

You can always see if their bank will do a signature guarantee or notarize their signature but I prefer to meet the people in person and  and have a legally binding contract with both signatures, signed in my presence.   

Anish Tolia The appreciation is far from a guarantee.

Most larger property management companies can write you a guarantee (of, say, half of what they expect you to make) and you can use that guarantee just like you would the lease from a long-term tenant.  

You do not tie the deposit to any guaranteed refund.

She said that they grant the loan to LLCs all the time as long as there is a personally guarantee on it.

However, our ROI calc as referenced above (about 22% in the first year with financing on a $93k prop) only includes cash flow and amortization equity, not appreciation (as it cannot be guaranteed, so it's more icing on the cake than anything else) or tax benefits.