I've always been curious as to any differences in mentality, cost structure, and general strategies a SFR builder might employ versus a flipper.

You bet.

We do not plan on living here for 30 years and I know not to bet on appreciation so I will do some value add to the house over time and expand it to a 4 bed 2.5 bath with less than a 40k investment, the layout will support it.

Woodcroft is always a safe bet but many of the houses are a dark/rustic style that is hard to update. 

I did get some conflicting information early on from the lender I was talking to in Oregon versus the one we went with in Iowa.  

Is the best bet to turn my back to all of the properties listed, and ignore them?

Get some education before betting your life savings. 

A cash buyer, known to the wholesaler, who has successfully closed several deals with them previously, is a much safer bet than someone who is applying for a mortgage loan.

Once you have a few local investments under your belt and have some hands on experience, then and only then should you consider out of state, but by that time I'd bet you would come to the same conclusion I did which is that there are plenty of profits to be had locally and there is no reason to venture out of state.

I am debating whether to go through a hard money route versus bank financing.Anyone have recommendations on solid hard money lenders, banks that lend in the North East Ohio (Cleveland – Akron – Canton) area?