Their original lease says that no pets are allowed except the one 10lbs dog that they told us about before they moved in.

Going to real estate meetings and reading forums online further confirmed my belief that everything sucked except real estate.  

That's me, except much better looking lolCurrently I am interested in STRs and MTRs (but not idea where) and LTRs but, again, no idea where.Any suggestions/experience in that area?

****Except your 401k and IRA’s.

I’m not sure why multiple lenders have told you that, but they definitely are the exception not the standard.

As long as you have lived there for a year or qualify for FHA exceptions, you should be able to get a conventional mortgage on your next home purchase (5% down, good credit, assuming DTI supports two houses etc) As for your current LLC, you can purchase your next house and quit claim your current one into the LLC for liability protection even though the loan would stay in your name 

Exception being on listings.

for a little background on myself, I own 3 income properties in an llc as well as my current house, they're all paid for except a heloc for 50k on one of them.  

Hi John, if the seller's title company is the most reputable in the area and you have an open line of communication with them, when the listing agent, seller's lawyer, and title company have told me there are no liens it's clear, and I can give the title company the liens exceptions list from auction.com "Most liens are removed after a foreclosure property sale, but certain liens may remain.Here are some examples:Any lien recorded on title prior in time to the foreclosing mortgage.First Mortgage (if the foreclosing mortgage is a second or third mortgage)HOA or COA assessment liens (in certain states)Mechanic’s Liens (in some states)Government liens such as state and federal tax liens, city or county liens, US Government liens.IRS liens (IRS may buy the property within 120 days after sale at the price paid at foreclosure sale)Code Enforcement Liens, Environmental Liens, and Utility LiensChild Support Liens"to make sure the title insurance would have coverage for these exceptions, the list from auctions.com, would it still very worrisome to use their title company?

No credit history except collections, terrible report.