That said, I know for a fact there are countless unlicensed guys in Phoenix doing jobs under the table that are well over the $1,000 threshold.

The answer is to stop working with non-ideal clients.Are there alternative ways to do or try something?

Alternatively, start rehabbing immediately using OPM(other people's money).

Alternatively make sure the deal at least works as a long term rental.

On your primary residence you can do 5% down, but on a vacation home you will need to do 10% or an alternative loan type (which almost certainly will not lower the down payment requirement).  

All alternatives welcome, I'm not beholden to my initial strategy.

If you was like me when you started I had to focus on hustling hard and looking for alternative financing strategies.

Yes I will be open to self-manage as an alternative option. 

A Taxpayer may identify as many as 3 alternate properties of any value.

Any other alternatives?