Logically the bike is a piece of crap, otherwise the person would have taken it with them.  

That seems kind of extreme for some wood dust.I also discovered that the previous owner didn't clear out all his crap and left a lot of old doors, building materials, etc in the back of the attic.Next steps are scheduling a junk hauler to get the doors, etc out and then either clean myself or hire someone to clean attic.

There is no "bird in hand" this is bird crap in hand and be ready for much more if you keep her.

They cut the grass every month or two so it always looked like crap.  

In my work as fiduciary lender, you'd be surprise what kind of crap I see people try.I think three years into an attempted AP deal mean the squatter is only 30% into the journey, in the OP's state.

@Steve Vaughan - I would naturally ask more questions because I know tenants make up a lot of crap.

Pay someone who is experienced a months rent to keep you from making a mistake that could cost you thousands of dollars by placing a crap tenant. 

The tenant will file an answer claiming all sorts of crap just to delay the eviction.

Craigslist is crap, at least here.

That's pretty much been it, i'll get texts every so often about crap breaking, but for the most part it's pretty rare because we try to go in and fix whatever needs done BEFORE we rent them out, so ongoing maintenance calls are pretty rare.