In this dream scenario, I have a decent house on the peninsula (which is already difficult to afford, even on an engineer's salary), I'd be living and raising a family with my lovely girlfriend Sammi (don't tell her I'm hoping to propose to her soon), and I'm regularly auditioning for professional shows up in San Francisco, and perhaps even New York occasionally.This won't be possible without a strong strategy and focus in real-estate.

Would you recommend foreclosure/shortsale /auction vs regular purchase?

No way are people spending $7 on a regular coffee when they walk into any pizzeria or chicken joint bargaining for a slice of pizza. 

Any list that you get in the future, try to 'match' it against the main parcel list ( most counties will release an update parcel list monthly, with updated owner/sales info, so update that county list regularly) in a manner like this                 bigger pockets is blocking this link so just add (  watch?

I understand you-all have to proteprotect yourself and your property but bad tenants also have good credit and get a regular paycheck. 

The FBI deals with hardened thugs on a regular basis, which is why they're so good at being FBI agents.

What I don't want to do is get a contractor and he quotes me a price on rehabbing with a different eye (you mentioned granite and he might just see regular countertops etc) then the average investor would see.

You are the buyer so the lender could care less what you say about a BPO.The BPO was performed by a third party who was paid a fee for doing a non-biased order.This is why with REO's you will have the listing broker in pre-list do a BPO and they will order and third party one as well.In short sales they will order a 3rd party BPO.If FHA short sale they will get an appraisal.Investors always look for minor stuff like carpet and paint.SO ARE regular home buyers who will pay much closer to asking than usually and investor will.So just watch this property but it might go to a regular buyer before it gets even close to being reduced to your price.Better values are in properties needing a lot of work in good areas that turn off regular home buyers.

Great majority of my regular clients are investors that own three or four properties.

It takes intelligence and knowledge to survive regular or even tough times.