However, there is that tiny issue of having some debt before I can get there.  

I was very candid about my intentions with my loan officer.Now, based on my income and situation, my loan officer told me that I qualify to purchase this home as a second/vacation home.

Their 3 office addresses are easily "findable"--- Should I send my "yellow letter" to their offices or is that in poor taste??

My office was inspected etc so I can do the full credit report and they have found evictions I could not find.  

Just because during off hours I can go from my office on Mill Plain to my house in SE Portland in only 20min, the majority of the time, the traffic is really bad and I have heard horror stories of it taking 3 hours to go 15 miles....

In my county, there will be an auction in a few weeks at the tax office. 

Typically there is a minimum office fee per transaction.

I'm limited to how long I can be at the Office of Records before he fusses, negotiating with a Seller, etc. etc. etc.    

I am an investor friendly escrow officer looking to help and close deals!

Have a broker or Loan Officer that knows what they're doing figure out your DTI first.