I'm looking to buy my first rental property (and planning for more buy & holds after that) and could use some help getting her on board. 

Essentially your “skin in the game” so it cannot be a loan from a bank, friend, family member, etc.

I'm finding that my cashflow numbers are modest compared to the claims others make on these boards. 

Your selling long term investments for purchase of what i would imagine might be short term investment(s) which may not qualify on 1031.

.% down of the purchase price and the rehab costsCan be used for primary residence with 1-4 units (could also be looked at as a disadvantage)  When using 2-4 unit property, projected income from other units can be used to qualify 6 months' worth of mortgage payments can be rolled into the renovation budget if the house is deemed uninhabitable by the HUD consultantCredit scores can go down to 600s (lender dependent) DTI can go to as high as automated underwriting system allows (typically 56.9%)Allows you to buy a property in any conditionCan use it to fix minor repairs all the way up to basically a full tear-downFHA 203k Disadvantages: Interest rates tend to be about .25-.5 higher than regular FHA loan Additional costs include HUD consultant fee, inspections, title updates, and supplemental origination fee (Cost of doing business, but this is built this into your numbers, so it's no big deal)Must use a licensed General Contractor for a full 203k or up to 3 specialized contractors on the limited 203k Must hold onto the property for 1 year and live in it. 

Bel Air/Edison is board ups, crime and again the cost of taxes and insurance in the city. 

(we will both put even amount of down payment -skin in the game)  Can we both apply for the loan or is it better to have one person finance? 

how do i qualify one lender from another to make sure they arent scams?

My travel schedule is all over the board, but would love to get something going in our area. 

I heard on the board that flips generally cost more to rehab, as they need to be done to a higher "quality" or look.