From my research it seems you get kinda screwed when using a portfolio lender because they want you to get a 15 year loan or a 7 year ARM.

But if I go into this armed with a general understanding of what a good strategy is I could eliminate me asking unneeded question and running up billable hours.

The ability to sell to Fannie/Freddie after closing is what makes low fixed rates possible.There are portfolio products out there that will go for 20% down, but the trade-off is it'll  be some combination of multiple points upfront, an ARM, and/or a higher rate (and/or commercial where you have to re-qualify every year).

Look at the small print to ensure it's a 30YF if that is what you want, and not an ARM or 15YF, but other than that they are legit." 

For commercial (typically an ARM, higher rate, point or points upfront), what @Ivory Hayes said.

Real Estate is explicitly exempted. http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/how-qualify-foreign-business-mississippi.html

LOC through the property management arm of our business. 

We have a retail team as well as an investor arm of our company that buys & wholesales properties.

It's all about the financing at 5+, at which you will probably get some arm with balloon payment, amortized over 20 or 30 years.

Lock arms with my brothers and sisters and march in the street protesting the injustice of making me get a license.