I'm curious about the comment that properties won't appraise because there's no listing agent involved.

My shorter-term goals aren't quite as lofty, because I know there is a lot of work involved to get there.

I'm heavily involved in large construction projects and I was seeing a lot of interest in the region for large scale development projects.

Although my husband is a agent and it was easy to put in the MLS, he didn’t want to be involved in showing the property (we have demanding w-2 jobs and 3 kids) so we found a local agent who agreed to take any potential tenants who contacted us directly and they would receive that $750 commission if one of those qualified and moved in.

You could look into a hard money loan in order to finance the deal and go about it that way or even look into private lenders that want to get involved in your project.

I will instead argue what I see as the pros and cons without having to involve any court. 

Hello Biggerpockets,I live in San Diego and I'm a project manager in mechanical construction and looking to find a way to get involved and get started in real estate.

The main reasons I do not like is the involvement of a HOA and many of them are built like well-fished apartments. 

My question is how do I involve my family in the deal for an owner occupied purchase?

This way you'll get an idea of how involved the owner is.