And on a pure investment property where you're making that real down payment (low risk), the math is substantially more generous than for someone trying to 3.5% down FHA "house hack" (higher risk).

With this question in particular I would say that I am genuinely unqualified to give you any sort of information that would be conducive to your investments, it would be purely speculative and I wouldn't stake my name on speculation.

I'm confused- are you trying to house hack or buy a pure investment? 

On the other extreme, you just happen to have a few associates in real estate that you lend money out in a revolving door and are not acting as a business in this venture - just purely a loan, then perhaps it is just portfolio interest income. 

.- Personal living experience: House hacking allows homeowners to live in one of the units, providing a more personal connection to the property compared to purely investment-focused properties.

Referring purely institutional lender not hard money or private

Is this purely a cosmetic update or does it need a full gut... or something in between?

I feel in a city like LA or Seattle (where I am currently) you have to spend a little more time than in a city like Orlando (where my units are) purely because of the market.

Pure luck!

All told each group has their own pro's and cons that I don't think anyone stands out as a "best" option based purely on marital and child status.