Times are changing and if you want to win, bet on the consumer.

Personally, my first real estate purchase was in California because I bet on appreciation. 

I don’t know what percent of commercial places have stoves but I bet it’s small. 

So you are betting on appreciation which goes against one of the laws of surviving any real estate market.  

As for the refi, I don't see any upside there, simply because you will have about 45 days for loan to close, and that could kill any potential offers, on top of not being able to show proof of funds, if you are offering cash.The HELOC to me seems like your best bet, but again you are committed to not buying anything for the 30-45 days between you pay off and getting the refi closed. 

Thought: if a tenant was able to have the requirements to get into a rental right now, I am betting they are pretty stable.

You may need to create an independent account that I would bet isn't free. 

Now, regarding real estate - I’m well aware that House Hacking is probably a safe bet right now.

Your best bet right now is to go by the books and wait It out. 

All I can tell you is that although it's extremely frustrating dealing with building departments and permitting there's no getting around them, even though it feels like dealing with the gestapo a times.As difficult as it may be, your best bet in dealing with them is to be friendly and humble, and leave out the "this isn't a free country" part.