Maybe the simple "twist" to incorporate would be to remove the "certified" part as it implies a level of professional training and could falsely be used as a credential.  

It comes across as asking for advice on how to get away with taking out a loan under false pretenses.

It's absurd.

Key element is to be truthful, and not make a false claim.I think this is the form your looking for, I could be wrong: http://www.courts.state.md.us/district/forms/civil/dccv001f.pdf

From the article, it seems like the whole idea of the law is to not make false promises.

We're building duplexes here in Colorado, specifically in Pueblo West, and the numbers only make sense because land with utilities can be bought at absurdly low prices yet there's still tremendous demand for housing.

Sure, just as Joe Smith will be lots and lots of false hits y9our task is calling every one of them and asking some key quesitons, do you own 123 main. 

First, it's very common for them to rent below market with the false idea that renters will appreciate the property and behave.

So I'm putting repairs at $37,800 ($30 x 1,260)Offer Price: Based off of the 70% rule my offer price should be $73,500Actually getting an offer accepted for $73,500 seems absurd.

Thus, the property went into foreclosure, and the buyer filed charges for theft of her money in the transaction, I assumed by filing a false police report.