And thank you @Joe Scaparra for lowering my blood pressure. :) I did get a really great inspector, who has followed up with me a lot and we talk pretty candidly about some of the things mentioned.

For every property we own the very first thing we do is to remove every plaint that is within 3 feet of the house, or any structure.You definitely have a moisture problem, lack or air circulation and not a window problem.

Are they related by blood/marriage?

I'm a contractor so it's in my blood.

Sounds like you're trying to get blood from a stone.

In NEPA (Scranton area) we've used licensed plumbers to install new gas boilers (either steam or hot water w circulating pump) for far less. 

The only thing I would say is to watch rental laws and taxes since, as you know, in California it takes God and 6 unbiased judges as well as a writ signed in blood in order to evict someone.

However, in order to get the benefit of the low down payment, the non-occupant coborrower must be a blood relative.

Be careful because sharks smell blood from very far away.

I'd move on, you can't get blood from a rock.