Also reading articles that imply that Warren Buffet and many others are investing here as well says something.

What banks have you tried and did they imply any reasons? 

Just to clarify, it seems that you're implying that there's no way to take the portion of my profits that should go to taxes and place them into an self directed IRA or 401K to defer taxes until a later time.

I am not implying any legal advice whatsoever  .  

It was a small 2 day course with a local trainer.

Sort of implied by previous responses, but I'd suggest driving over, and looking around the neighborhood. 

I’ve met Jarred and he’s a nice guy and a personal trainer.

Some of those pools will still be empty and although that doesn't imply any motivation whatsoever, I've bought lots of houses that looked like hell when I pulled them up on Google maps.

I didn't mean to imply that everyone buys on the MLS.

Eviction implies they have a lease in place, but you are forcefully removing them.