The program has been great for my own STR investments and my co-hosting business.

Your taxes are none of the ex wife's business and this would seem to address your concerns.I would also put her on notice that future requests for financial discovery will be two-way and if a discrepancy is seen in the other direction you will seek support from her.

Your net gain is your net sale, minus your adjust cost basis.

I've learned that it's extremely important to find balance in this industry as your passion for your business can impact your personal life greatly!

Quote from @Devin James: Im currently learning this lesson with New Builds that have taken twice as long to complete than anticipated.....Finishing a Real Estate project ASAP is critical because...1) Holding Costs add up quickly- Loan Interest- Property Taxes- Insurance2) Investor Capital- Our financial projections are dependent on how fast we can turn our investors capital.

How about using SDIRAs not to hold assets but to operate businesses?

Be honest with them if that is what you are doing though so you don't waste their time if they are busy.

https://azbigmedia.com/business/economy/mesa-phoenix-rank-in...

Just my personal opinion - get a mentor or a person who already has good experience running STR business, preferably in your area (but not 100% required). 

I am doing my best to accommodate and fix the insulation as well as see if there are programs in place to lower the cost. however i want to be firm with tenant as they are not compliant with paying rent because of the cost of the utilities.