I offered to get rid of the "stuff".

when you do a 1031 exchange you are able to rid yourself of the property without paying capital gains at the time of sale.

If you need more than that, well get rid of the stupid toys LOL ,

I'd also get proof of their insurance and say it must be active for the duration of their lease...and write rental insurance as part of the lease, so if they cancel it, you can get rid of them.

If you want them to be part of their team, treat them as a team member.If they are bad get rid of them.  

It sounds like to need to get rid of this tenant.

I'd also look at landlord tenancy laws for WA as I think they are pretty tenant friendly and getting rid of a bad tenant (even one who doesn't pay rent) may be hard.You mentioned you'd profit $130K if you sold it. 

Honestly I'm scared that if I get rid of them all now I'll be kicking myself in 10 years for how shortsighted I was. 

I don't lie to get rid of a tenant.

With savings rates so high I'd save in a money market mutual fund until I had enough to get rid of PMI on my primary.