VA doesn't require PMI, however, there is a fat "VA funding fee" of like 2%.

We do not know if this is true, feel free to disagree:Essentially, really fat people have a lot of difficulty passing waste when sitting on the toilet.

I found they tended to get fat and happy after awhile.

Having expensive car loans, even having expensive cars is for fat cat rich investors. 

Yeah fat chance.

Everyone should boycott them anyway, based on fat content.

So keep fat margins in all of your estimates. 

I know if I hired one to take care of a property, there would be a fat bonus at the end of the year if there were no problems and I was making money because of their good management.

If he was originally on the application you should have discovered the seven evictions (pro-tenant) and gave a big fat NO to rent to them.If he was not on the lease then monthly inspections should have shown unauthorized tenants and also condition issues with the property so you can evict early as possible.

I also completely understand that if you're running many rentals you can't waiver at all and therefore this guy would be told a big fat no, but since this is my one and only rental I feel like I have a little more flexibility.