If it is, go to your city’s planning division and tell them your plans to add a bedroom and see if your existing septic tank is big enough.

My idea is to purchase a property with a division (or the possibility of one) so I can place her in a small apartment 1/1 and rent the rest of the house to offset the Mtg as much as I can.As things are today its been impossible to find something that covers it all, Im seeing that I would still have to come up with some cash every month.I met with a lender yesterday and he presented to me an option for a 5% down loan.

If you did and had problems leave them a review with the Better Business Bureau, here and also contact the FTC Consumer Protection division.

Here in Louisiana the Department of Health and Human Services Division of Health and Hospitals most License Adult Residential Facilities of any kind plus, a Certificate of Need is required. 

i called the city of Tampa and talked to the division responsible for zoning for houses.

I worry if it will get divisive, my greatest wealth growing up was family, and I am close to my siblings still.

Call the police - Get ahold of the OIC (Officer in Charge) of the division of the city where you're renovating the property.

They have 4 main divisions: Acquisitions, Property Management, Retail, and In-House investor-friendly lending.

and if all else fails simply call the state division that controls real estate lending and ask them.. 

Here's the New Jersey law regarding security deposits:https://www.nj.gov/dca/divisions/codes/publications/pdf_lti/...