This is a rant about the nightmare that is getting a conventional mortgage at Chase and I'm not sure if this is the right place to do it but I want this to be a warning to any other investor that may be looking to use Chase especially on a deal that has a tight closing window.

I already gave them one warning about all of the above items ("excessive noise", unauthorized pet, parking violations, trash, all in one warning). 

That's why I warn sellers that setting too high a price, even if people would normally be willing to pay that much, would be screening out all but the most cash-rich of buyers and thus limit the potential to make an actual sale.

Their friend who is an investor himself, had warned them against this option due to the escalation (AKA due-on-sale) clause.

I could reimburse with warning that next time I need to be aware, so I can buy the appliance. 

So if the person is month to month- give them fair warning (60 days) after which the rate increase applies. 

I warn against this all the time.

WARNING, you NEED to do a title search first to make sure there isnt a 100k mortgage luring in the background, and you NEED to get them to move out BEFORE you pay any of their debts, or you might learn a painful lesson in human nature. 

Be warned that if you do that the portfolio is the identification. 

It's definitely a risk, but it's always a risk putting a property under contract because your buyer can also back out without warning.