Your income definitely shows you could do a new build, but if you are a first-time builder, finding land, construction costs, and managing a new build will be way out of your zone of genius, especially if you both work busy jobs.To get value add, you can look for a multi that has really good space/bones, but needs upgrading so you can live in a really nice place and create a second nice space for rent/family.

New home builders are offering great rates with their lenders and paying closing costs, with a VA loan you can put 0% down, its insane.

I'd like to sell it or JV with a builder. 

I am a builder and I have some land and want to build a tiny home park. 

Engage with local officers to gather insights about the neighborhood, and don't hesitate to ask them specific questions about the property.When touring, pay attention to tonality, body language, and hidden cues from sellers.

The builder put in the bathtub first before enclosing the bathroom walls. 

Ive had decent luck with the NAHB Home builders association. https://www.nahb.org/nahb-community/nahb-directories They have a whole section dedicated to remodelers.

A gym membership would only be a selling point for a professional bodybuilder.

Look for a small/mid size local bank that specializes in this, they will detail what you need, survey, building permit, architectural plans and a builder contracted for starters.Or when you're ready to subdivide/redevelop you just sell to a builder and have them split the lots and transfer title to you for your smaller lot, he keeps the others and let him mess with the utilities and building. 

@Sunjeeve Weerasinghe we have moved entirly to vinyl plank in our properties (and so have a lot of major builders) as you can get commercial grade with 30+ year wear layers on them, they are water proof, do not chip (though they can be cut or torn) and are quite a bit cheaper than tile.