Quote from @Jeff S.:
Your question, @Ben Scarborough, is sort of an inkblot test for lending. Many have their own made-up definitions. These are often inconsistent and completely non-sensical. For some reason, it’s a topic many here feel strongly about and are emotionally tied. Others write long magazine articles torturing their definitions. If you can't explain something simply ...
Private lenders are your friends and family. Hard money lenders are in the lending business. (If a professional lender loans to his mom, is it a private loan or a hard money loan?)
Private lenders don’t charge points or interest. Hard money lenders charge these. (If your mom makes a loan to you and charges points, is she now a hard money lender?)
Hard Money lenders are licensed. Private lenders are not. (So, I guess you can’t call yourself a private lender in a state that requires a license?)
If your terms are strict, you’re a hard money lender. If they are less strict, you’re a private lender. (?????)
These are distinctions with no difference. In fact, though “Lender” (and “Broker”) are legal terms, there are no legal definitions for hard money or private money. They are both marketing terms. Marketing is not always a ploy.
Normally, who cares? Except the made-up definitions get dangerous when those who define themselves or their lender as “private,” believe it’s, therefore, ok to skimp on origination. I see this here all the time. “All your mom needs are a note and a deed of trust.” “Get your loan docs from a title company.” “Why do I have to spend $1000 for title insurance?” “Where on the web can I get my note?” Who’s willing to share their note?”
Your mom might want to sell her loan one day. Or, unfortunately, it could be contested by a disgruntled borrower. Just watch what happens, as we see property prices start to fall again. Try foreclosing with bad paper. A note buyer or a judge won’t care what your mom calls herself.
Don’t get hung up on the title.
Not everything can be explained simply. There is no legal term for BRRRR or househacking either but anyone with any experience in the RE investing industry knows their definitions regardless if they appear in a dictionary or not, so this argument does not hold water. It appears you have taken much of what I stated in my previous post well out of context. Note that I used the word "typically" on multiple occasions.
"Private lenders are your friends and family. Hard money lenders are in the lending business. (If a professional lender loans to his mom, is it a private loan or a hard money loan?)" - Taken out of context. To answer your question, did MOM use her lending license and all the docs used for any other hard money loan she typically uses and more importantly, was it all her money or that of OPM? If the license was used and the money came from investors, she was brokering and as such, the license was required in all states and therefore, it was a hard money loan.
"Private lenders don’t charge points or interest. Hard money lenders charge these. (If your mom makes a loan to you and charges points, is she now a hard money lender?)" - charging points is not a defining issue to private or hard money. On this topic, if the interest rate plus points is in excess of the state usury limits, then a lending license would be required and as such, a hard money lender would need to be used.
"Hard Money lenders are licensed. Private lenders are not. (So, I guess you can’t call yourself a private lender in a state that requires a license?)" - NOT what I said, I said "typically". No state requires a lending license to make a personal loan secured by real estate so long as it is within the usury limits of that state (although some states may restrict the amount of loans of this type you could make in a year before requiring a license).
"If your terms are strict, you’re a hard money lender. If they are less strict, you’re a private lender. (?????)" - That is sad if this is what you ascertained from my post. You are poorly paraphrasing here.
While I agree one should not get "hung up" on a title, there is a distinct difference between hard and private money lenders and investors should know the difference. If you preaching they are one and the same, you are wrong and are doing a disservice to other readers claiming that. There are a lot of terms in our industry which have been made up and will not appear in dictionaries or law books, that does not change the fact that they have specific definitions that the majority consensus uses to define the term, BRRRR or househacking as perfect examples.