Newbie Dilemma: How do you vet a Guru, a Coach, or A Mentor?

Question

I admit it: I am a newbie. I know that I want to do "something" with real estate investing, but I have not worked out yet what that exact something is. I also admit that I am vulnerable at this stage and for anything that I wish to do, I need to "proceed with caution."

With that in mind, when you were a newbie, did any one person reach out to you with an offer to serve as a Mentor? If so, how did you go about vetting that person? Did you simply rely on their pitch to you or did you verify their claims based upon recommendations and referrals from others? If you hired a Coach or Mentor, how did that experience work out for you?

I would appreciate your feedback, positive or otherwise, regarding your experience in working with Coaches and Mentors.

I should mention that I am not looking at a Coach or Mentor as a substitute for the hard work of preparing myself and educating myself to the best of my ability. I regard a Coach or a Mentor as someone who can serve as a viable guide, based upon their own proven and verifiable track record of success in their own endeavors, and in helping others to succeed.

Thanks in advance for your support, encouragement and advice!

Corby Goade · Answer

I think newbies on BP WAYYYY over think this mentorship thing. If you want to learn from people who are making magic happen- go to meet ups, message people in local RE forums on BP or FB. Buy them coffee or lunch, be humble and grateful and ask a billion questions and smile and thank them for their time. Heck, you might even become friends. I have lots of people reach out to me and 95% of them are not willing to do what it takes. I know you said you are willing to work, but EVERYONE says they are willing to work, most people aren't. I"ve never had a newbie reach out to me and tell me they wanted to invest but aren't willing to work or take on any risk, but the reality is that most just won't do it. Secondly- it's almost comical how many times a new investor asks for some of my time, asks me a bunch of questions and then tells me that what I have already done and accomplished is not possible because of something they read on BP or heard on a podcast. It's infuriating- don't be that person. In any case- stop thinking of "mentorship" as some formal type of agreement. Integrate yourself with the people doing deals in your market, make friends and people will happily share ideas, deals and resources. Best of luck!

Shiloh Lundahl · Answer

@Tony Valle in my opinion coaches and mentors play different roles.A mentor is someone you look up to and you want to emulate in a specific area of life such as a business mentor or spiritual mentor. Usually a mentor relationship is organic and is non paid. The mentor doesn’t have a monetary obligation to teach or guide you but through the relationship you have with the mentor you pick up and learn things that you adopt into your life. Coaching, on the other hand, is usually a paid position and there is an expectation of specific services and the main goal of coaching is for you to get better results in the specific area in which you are being coached than you would get doing it on your own.Personally, I am a mentor to a few and I have coached around a dozen people who wanted to learn how to invest in real estate. What I suggest people who are looking for coaching do is find out the results that the recent students of the coach are getting during the coaching period and see if those are the results that I want. I would find out if the results are consistent among all the students or if only a few are having success while the majority don’t. Then I would call a few current or recent students and verify their success and how the specific coaching was a part of that success.After doing that, I would determine if the results are worth the cost of coaching and if they are then I would pay the price. If you are not willing beforehand to pay the coaches fee or you want a discount on the price of coaching, then don’t waste everyone’s time. Don’t do this because you are curious. Only do this if you are willing to pay the price once you find out that the results are consistent with what the coach has described.

Shiela R. · Answer

Hi @Tony Valle. Welcome to BP. So when investors first start they usually have 1 of the following: time, money or knowledge. I'd dig a little deeper before looking for a coach or mentor. What do you like and what are you good at? What do you dislike? What do you know? What are you interested in?I paid an upfront fee and split the first 2 deals with my mentor and it was the best money I ever spent. I learned so much about how to communicate (marketing, how to market and what to say when sellers call me and other effective messaging). He taught me scripts based on NLP and I still use this language bc it works. IMO, my mentor was a fast track to success. Well worth the money.

Tony Valle · Answer

Thanks, Hamp! I am doing all the things you just mentioned. As it happens, I found a REIA today and a local meeting is taking place this week, so the timing is perfect! And there is someone there who is also offering a mentoring program so I will check it out and proceed with caution. I greatly appreciate your thoughtful reply and I will continue to build upon my knowledge base day by day. I hear good things about San Antonio real estate!

Nate Marshall · Answer

Talk to people who have worked with them. I have had 2 of my people tell me in the last week I should charge $20,000.00 for mine. Batting .500 on the success rate of people I've worked with. So talk to their people. Who have they educated or helped.

Brandon Rabe · Answer

Lots of great responses here. In my personal journey, I went the mentor/coaching route and hired someone to hold me accountable to my goals. I "wasted" about 7 months trying to figure it out on my own that I needed to do something different. Outside of college or a job, I had never paid for any type of training. It definitely wasn't cheap, but absolutely worth it. I still subscribe to 1:1 coaching in other areas of my life because of it. Heck, Michel Jordan and Kobe Bryant had Tim Grover to elevate them to where they got, why won't I at least consider hiring a coach to coach me lol. I also coach others to their first property through accountability and guidance. A the end of the day, see that whoever you choose has what you want and is doing what you want to do.

Tony Valle · Answer

Hello Shiloh, I am extremely grateful to you for this thoughtful response that perfectly defines the distinction between a Mentor and a Coach. There are a great many Investors on Bigger Pockets who provide some level of mentorship to fellow Investors and you are absolutely right, not many are able to serve as a Coach. I will continue to learn from the Mentors around me. I will definitely consider hiring the Coach once I have applied all the due diligence that you so expertly laid out and advised anyone to do before taking that step.

Guy Gimenez · Answer

It really depends on how you define the terms mentor and coach. The definition of each varies wildly, not unlike the definitions of hard money and private money. To me, a mentor is someone who provides general guidance but does not get deep into the weeds, whereas a a coach is active in helping with your daily or weekly real estate decisions. My mentors (attorneys) were not paid, however, I provided them value by bringing them my business and referrals. My coach was paid and helped me go deeper into the mechanics and strategies of investing. I have also mentored and coached others to whom I have a close relationship with and whom I knew had what it takes to grow and be successful. I have refused to mentor and coach many. I have had the benefit of both mentors and coaches (general business and investing) and it was money well spent. But I have seen newbie's, even very intelligent business professionals, get taken to the bank for tens of thousands of dollars by "coaches and mentors" who are merely highly effective salespeople and excellent marketers but nothing more. They know most new investors are easy prey and will do no vetting. Regardless of which you're looking for, you can vet them by talking to them at REI events, asking questions about their experience, asking others in the REI clubs / events what they know about the coach / mentor. You should also spend time vetting them online. You'd be surprised as how many have ongoing criminal cases or arrest records for fraud. There are both free and paid sites online for vetting someone (real property records, public criminal records, etc.). You can also ask their students about their successes (if any) from working with the coach / mentor. Don't be swayed by the coach / mentor's ability to wow you with words but instead take your time to research them thoroughly online and off. And remember that what will ultimately determine your success is YOU and what you're willing to do to achieve your goals, which must be clearly defined. In my first year in real estate, I worked my W-2 job (evening shift), did real estate during the day and studied at least 3 to 4 hours every night. I lived off 4 hours sleep a night for a year. I was exhausted at the end of 1999 but it allowed me to leave my W-2 job and go full time into real estate so it was very much worth it. The mantra you should live by is this. Believe none of what you hear and only half of what you see.

Hamp Lee III · Answer

I reached out to a few people seeking mentorship, but their help often came with a hefty price. Now, some would like to think you need to put some “skin in the game” to get started, but when starting out, I would tell you to save your money for mentoring programs, coaching, and the like and educate yourself first to know what niche interests you. Read blogs and books, listen to podcasts, and watch videos. There are a ton of free resources to help you get started and learn. Join a local real estate investing association and network with some of the attendees. This might be one of the best ways to “vet” someone because you can see their work and meet people who have worked with them. When I sought out mentoring, some of the people I was following on Instagram hit me up asking if I was into crypto. Crypto? All you talk about is real estate investing…ah I see, that’s just your “front” to get in the door… I know someone that spent over $10K for mentorship and haven’t seen one cent from their investment. Some others on here might say different, but I wanted to share my opinion.I wish you all the best in your investing journey!

Tony Valle · Answer

Hello Sheila, I thank you for your thought provoking response! I do believe that I have enough time, money and knowledge (some experience as well) to embark on this journey. I am actively engaged in the process of using my time wisely to acquire more knowledge and to develop my skills in the realm of real estate investing. I seem to be finding resources on a daily basis that will help me to sharpen my focus. And I believe that the questions you have posed are essential ones for me to answer. I will do so and spend additional time "digging deeper," as you have advised. I appreciate your encouraging response.