Changing My Mindset

[Vincent Pirrone]

I've been here listening and reading things on BiggerPockets for a few years now.

In December 2018 I finally decided to pull the trigger and buy my first house. I bought the house with the intention of turning it into a duplex and living in half of it. I was successful in that.

I also refinanced it to get my mortgage payment lower. And now I only contribute about $200 towards the mortgage and I cover all of the utilities.

And from there I thought I was good. Took a step back to admire my work. I was pretty proud.

And then I realized that I screwed myself (can I say that on here?).

First, I bought a house that appraised at the value that I bought it. Zero Equity. Terrible.

Second, at the time I was refinancing my house, my car died completely so in order to afford the car I had to combine all of my credit card debt into a personal loan to raise my credit.

Now, I have a Mortgage, Personal Loan, Car Loan, and Student Loans. My debt to income ratio is about 43% (or 35% with my tenant). And, according to the bank I only have 7% equity (Zillow and Redfin show me at 15%) in my house, currently.

Basically, moving forward with investments using this house, is a bust.

So I gave up. Had an anxiety attack. No hope.

I started scrambling to start other side businesses to make enough money for another down payment and repair costs. My goal was to get an extra 30k. Fast.

I started side business after side business. Trying to make that extra buck. But, they all failed. Just reinforcing my draw towards failure. I was starting to really give up. But I always have my heart set on escaping this rat race.

So I kept working, every chance I got. And then boom. Another mental breakdown. (Actually, happened last night).

But last night, I also had the truth thrown at me by some loved ones. I work too hard. I have really high expectations of myself. And, I'm just generally too hard on myself and don't give myself credit for what I have accomplished.

So, I decided to take a step back and regroup.

I'm only paying $200 plus utilities for my housing. That's pretty phenomenal.

I have a great work ethic. Sometimes a little too hardcore.

I understand the ins and outside of basic real estate. Not many people my age do.

My current house is a dead end in terms of investing. But one day it will be my greatest asset.

I have decided to become more serious about real estate and learn how to take hold of my situation and make it work for me. I will be attending local groups, talking to people, learning how they invest and start gathering new ideas that I might be able to use. Sometimes you just have to force yourself to take a step back and see where you're at, what you have accomplished, and where you can go from here.

If anyone has any comments or advice, I would love to hear from you. Thank you.

[Abel Curiel]

Thanks for sharing this @Vincent Pirrone!

Its a very accurate depiction of the ups and downs of business... and LIFE!

I think we all experience when we're stretching ourselves to achieve something great. If we aren't failing, we aren't trying.

That being said... keep doing your thing! I think your plan to attend local meetups, learn more, and surround yourself with like-minded folks is going to springboard you into a whole different level of achievement.

You're right for taking a step back and acknowledging the good you've done. David Goggins mentioned a concept that illustrates this... In his book "Can't hurt me" he talks about digging into you 'cookie jar' whenever you're feeling down. He was once obese and would eat too many sweats especially when stressed or depressed. So, the 'cookie jar' is meant to symbolize something that is satisfying... only its not a cookie. His concept advises us to dig into a cookie jar of passed successes. Think about that time when you walked that extra mile despite feeling tired, won that trophy, hit your weight loss goal, hit that savings goal, etc. Dig into your cookie jar of achievements large and small... this will help you realize that setbacks only gear you up for comebacks!

To get a little specific, connect with lenders, CPAs, agents and investors who understand your long-term plan and give you practical advice on what to hit your goals.

Best of luck to you moving forward!

Abel