Existential questions for the previous renters of my new property

[Genny Li]

I bought a condo that's been a student rental for 23 years.  It was actually what I would call "student clean" when I got it, so it only took an hour of vacuuming per room to get it to the point where the carpets could be shampoo'd, etc.  The sinks and counters and even fridge and oven were actually truly clean!  

But I do have some questions for the 23 years of students who came before...

1. Why take the the strike plate off the doorframe? The door closes and latches fine.  What did you do with it?

2. How did you get pubes on the bathroom CEILING that I had to pick off to repaint? HOW?

3. How could any human being get an exhaust vent *that* dirty?

4. Who told you that the proper way to spackle a tiny nail hole is to put a big 2x2" lump of drywall mud on it?

5. How many fairy lights have been put up? And why couldn't you just use the previous pushpin holes for your own?

6. What did you do with the switch plate covers that you lost? Why did you take them off in the first place?  How did you lose screws so that you stole screws from other switch plate covers to fill them in on the missing ones?

7. This one is for the previous owners....  Did you know that wall paint is supposed to go on the *wall* and not on the outlet covers/outlets/wall vents?  I know the previous owners didn't lose the switch plate covers because they didn't remove them whenever they repainted!

Anyway, I just did a full repaint of the ceiling and baseboards for the first time since construction, as well as taking the walls from mid-aughts-earthtone brown to Navajo White (I'm skipping the greige/gray and going to a more classic neutral because the gray is definitely on the way out by now) and fixed all the little things that were off.  Renters in it two weeks after closing, so I'm happy!

The kitchen is new, the bathrooms old but have recently refinished shower surrounds, but the golden oak cabinets in the bathrooms need painting and the 90s toilets that clog like crazy need replacing and the counters, sinks, and rusty vanity lights need replacing, too.  That will happen over time, however. :)

[Lynnette E.]

Originally posted by @Genny Li:

I bought a condo that's been a student rental for 23 years.  It was actually what I would call "student clean" when I got it, so it only took an hour of vacuuming per room to get it to the point where the carpets could be shampoo'd, etc.  The sinks and counters and even fridge and oven were actually truly clean!  

But I do have some questions for the 23 years of students who came before...

1. Why take the the strike plate off the doorframe? The door closes and latches fine.  What did you do with it?

2. How did you get pubes on the bathroom CEILING that I had to pick off to repaint? HOW?

3. How could any human being get an exhaust vent *that* dirty?

4. Who told you that the proper way to spackle a tiny nail hole is to put a big 2x2" lump of drywall mud on it?

5. How many fairy lights have been put up? And why couldn't you just use the previous pushpin holes for your own?

6. What did you do with the switch plate covers that you lost? Why did you take them off in the first place?  How did you lose screws so that you stole screws from other switch plate covers to fill them in on the missing ones?

7. This one is for the previous owners....  Did you know that wall paint is supposed to go on the *wall* and not on the outlet covers/outlets/wall vents?  I know the previous owners didn't lose the switch plate covers because they didn't remove them whenever they repainted!

Anyway, I just did a full repaint of the ceiling and baseboards for the first time since construction, as well as taking the walls from mid-aughts-earthtone brown to Navajo White (I'm skipping the greige/gray and going to a more classic neutral because the gray is definitely on the way out by now) and fixed all the little things that were off.  Renters in it two weeks after closing, so I'm happy!

The kitchen is new, the bathrooms old but have recently refinished shower surrounds, but the golden oak cabinets in the bathrooms need painting and the 90s toilets that clog like crazy need replacing and the counters, sinks, and rusty vanity lights need replacing, too.  That will happen over time, however. :)

 Sadly, I think I have figured out their answers to these questions...

1. Why take the the strike plate off the doorframe? The door closes and latches fine. What did you do with it?

The door was slammed many times.  And there were fights with one person trying to push it open and someone on the other side tried to hold it closed, so the tongue of the door kept catching the strike plate.  IT became sooo loose it kept catching the tongue.  It was easier to pull it off, or just let it fall and kick it somewhere to be swept up.

2. How did you get pubes on the bathroom CEILING that I had to pick off to repaint? HOW?

Powerful showerheads and, well, self satisfaction.  Do you really need details?  And you want to know what else was up there?  Did you look with a fluorescence light?  You touched it?

3. How could any human being get an exhaust vent *that* dirty?

See the answer to number 2 above, and just so you know the cleaning lady did not clean that for you!  So after 23 years, what do you really expect?

4. Who told you that the proper way to spackle a tiny nail hole is to put a big 2x2" lump of drywall mud on it?

Why are YOU complaining?  You did not see the hole did you?  Perfectly fine way to hide the hole, works every time!  Ask any renter!  And at least it did not attract ants like filling it with toothpaste does.

5. How many fairy lights have been put up? And why couldn't you just use the previous pushpin holes for your own?

Lots of fairy lights.  They are magic!  You can not reuse the old holes, the holes get too big and the push pins will fall out.  Aren't you glad I did not use a U-nail?

6. What did you do with the switch plate covers that you lost? Why did you take them off in the first place? How did you lose screws so that you stole screws from other switch plate covers to fill them in on the missing ones?

Who wants plain, run of the mill switch plate covers?  Not us!  We put on decorative ones that matched how we were feeling.  And no way we were going to leave them.  Or their screws.  We need the screws to put then up in our next place.  Your old ones, we put some back up that were under the couch.  The rest were probably swept into the trash with the door frame thingy.   We found some of the screws under the couch, but not all of them.

7. This one is for the previous owners.... Did you know that wall paint is supposed to go on the *wall* and not on the outlet covers/outlets/wall vents? I know the previous owners didn't lose the switch plate covers because they didn't remove them whenever they repainted!

We painted the switch plate covers hoping that they would get stuck to the walls.  Like when we painted the windows and then they never opened again.  It did not work well, the still came off, as, well, you noticed.  At least it let the tenants know what ones are ours and that they should not take.