Advice for how to put my brother to move out of my house

[Thresa Chang]

My brother moved in with me (7-years ago) in the middle of his divorce. My mother told me that he will buy his own house after divorce final. After 3-4 years, divorce was final and he got 2-million dollars. He has invested his money and ask me if he could stay little longer, i said ok. Two years later, his teenage  son moved in to my attached guest house which i rented out to a friend before. That time my brother has been living with me for 5 year already, he paid nothing except his own food. (probably because i'm a vegan & i don't buy meat). After his son moved in two years ago, i asked my brother to pay electric bill and internet. Now I'm planning to retire next year and thinking about moving to guest house and rent the main house for income.  So i told him to find own place next year, he got upset and not talking to me, 3 months already. FYI  I'm a single and my parents passed & he is the only sibling. But i really don't want to live him, i never want to live with him first place. He didn't work either but he got rental income $4000/month (from china). I don't want to cut the all ties with my nephew.

[Todd Jones]

I don’t think this is a simple process.

He’s avoiding you intentionally knowing you won’t approach him. If he takes this route just because you’re asked to pay electric and internet, he’s not focused on your interest .He will prob keep this up for years.

Logically, if he’s not talking to you now, what will happen if you confront him further? He won’t talk to you, which is the same thing occurring now.

Suggestion:

1) Confron him directly not even asking “can we talk” or “we need to talk”. Just say I have to rent the main house as soon as possible. I love you but I need you to move out in 45 days as I’m going to start putting up for rent.” If he just walks away, that means he heard you.

2) Start moving your stuff to the guest house. That includes silverware. 

3) If the guest house can get the internet, change the passcode to the router so only you will know. Else, cancel it and get a new one setup. THAT will get his attention.

All of a sudden, he will want to talk.