Having a hard time making sense of "closing costs"

[Christopher Davis]

So, I'm looking at various loan options. See attached jpgs. I'm working on my first deal. I am talking to a local lender who was referred to me. We had a good meeting, and he is giving me different options. We broke them down and looked at itemized closing costs, and he sent me the breakdown, which I am looking at for one hypothetical loan.

I'm just getting overwhelmed trying to understand all this. Basically it's a 228k loan at 4% for 30 yrs. So it's 1088.51/mo. (hypothetical purchase price of 240k at 5% down). I have nothing to base the competitiveness of the closing fees on. Closing costs appear to be $5854.10, with reserves at $1109.98.

Total cash in with 5% plus closing costs = 18,964.08. Is it negotiable that the seller pay this? Or split it? What would you do?

Obviously I will follow up with this lender and continue to review, break it down, and look at other options since this is only hypothetical depending on the property. But I could use another set of eyes for now. Thank you for any guidance!

Are these fees all standard? Does this look good? Which fees seem high?