HELP!! Refi on 1st BRRRR & Private Equity on 2nd - DTI TOO HIGH!!

[Chris Grizzaffi]

I am self-employed (I write off a lot), and I purchased my first BRRRR a couple weeks ago. I am in the middle of both renovations and a refi on the hard money I currently have in place.

Another property has fallen in my lap, and I have a private equity partner lined up for this property. However, the lender for my refi (who does a ton of investor loans) says purchasing this home (even with cash) puts my DTI over their threshold and jeopardizes my refi.

I would still like to proceed with this second home, but how should I do so? Do I ask my buddy (private equity) to just buy the home himself, putting the deed in his name while I do the work on it, and then we deed it over once my refinance is done? 

I am in option on this second home, and I am set to close on Monday. What do I do?